Dear Ms. Fear

Dear Ms. Fear,

it has come to my attention
I thought I should mention
that we appear to have fallen out,
and it has to be said
that I am feeling misled
and I am having these feelings of doubt.
You see I believe
that I don’t receive
your presence here in my life
so I’d like to propose
before our love goes
that you become my wife.
Now don’t you go thinking
that I have been drinking
because I have thought this through
if I see you more often
my heart will soon soften
and I will get used to you.

If you look in the past
we have had a blast
like the times we flew on a plane
and we got it made
at my kung fu grade
oh I would love to do that again,
and you didn’t oppose
when I read out my prose
while I was tearful and grieving
then there was that time
after a strenuous climb
my jump left you disbelieving.

I want to do more
and I’ll be your whore
spread eagled and tied to the bed,
we could try power kiting
or eskrima stick fighting
we could go sky diving instead,
how about hang gliding
or bare backed horse riding
we could pilot a microlight
stock car racing
maybe storm chasing
keeping you and I up all night.
Ever tried coasteering?
that sounds god fearing
and so does bungee jumping
oh what do you say?
let me lead you astray
please let me get your heart pumping.

Write me a yes
at my parents address
or telephone so we can speak
love you dearly
yours sincerely
Crazy D

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